Dear Daddy...

Dear Daddy, My Father, My Precious Jesus,

As I sit back and reflect on 2009 one word echoes deep within my soul, faithful. I can’t begin to express my gratitude to you for the year that you have blessed me with, but thank you, thank you Jesus.

My heart aches as I realize more and more each day the depravity of my own soul, the wickedness of my own heart, and the evil thoughts of my mind; I am astonished by the reality of it all despite the understanding of your Word that you have imparted to me, despite the reality of the cross of Christ, and the hope that I cling so tightly to. It is so easy to compare myself to the Christians around me, or even the spiritual “giants” of the faith rather than to the only measure we are held to, that of Jesus Christ. I so often rely on my own strength and my own willpower to overcome the sin that so easily entangles me rather than on yours. I find myself in despair and shame as I ponder the sin that wraps my heart and the intentions that cultivate and breed actions that are far from pleasing to you, your grace at times seems far too much to comprehend. I read a quote recently by Jerry Bridges that said, “Remember that your worst days are never so bad that you are beyond the reach of God's grace, nor are your best days ever so good that you are beyond the need of it”, the reality of that hit me hard. I am fully dependent on you Father, FULLY DEPENDENT on you no matter what season, what circumstance, or what kind of day I find myself in. A wretched sinner I am, but a wretched sinner that has been mercifully bought at a price and who stands under the grace of a gracious Savior. Oh thank you Jesus!

This year has been one full of surprises, a season of growing in ways that were so needed in my pursuit of you, and trials that have brought me to my knees in surrender consistently. I am humbled by the work of you sovereign God, you God who made the stars and the trees are the same God that formed me while I was in my mother’s womb and who planned out each step I would take long before the world even existed; that blows my mind! To say I have been humbled this year is a truth that I am thankful for despite the pain that it brought. Why is it Jesus that in the times of our breaking we find your love to be so acute? Why is it Father that when the fire is all around us we find peace? It is your ever present Spirit and the hope that you have provided that has pulled me through the dark times this year, it is that hope that I cling so tightly to today and long for to unfold into sight.

On top of the trials have been a multitude of blessings that I can’t even begin to count, blessings that have enabled me to see God’s hand like never before. I am astounded by your working oh God, amazed. I am undeserving of any of the blessings you have given me both temporal and eternal and more importantly grateful for the opportunities to be used by YOU. What a deep-seated irreplaceable joy I find in working for You God, a joy that never fades. Thank you for that.

As 2010 is right around the corner and as I embark on yet another very new and surprising season of my life I am certain of one thing my God, and that is what you have taught me this year, I am certain that you are FAITHFUL. From generations past to the present day and into eternity future you are immutable, never fading, faithfully dependable, you ARE. The faithfulness I have seen displayed this year in my life and the lives around me brings me to my knees in humble adoration of a God who despite our inadequacies, despite our failings, despite our lack of trust, IS ALWAYS FAITHFUL.

Thank you daddy for 2009 and I trust you wholly for 2010, for as you say in Psalm 46:10 we can BE STILL AND KNOW THAT YOU ARE GOD!!

Love,
Your Daughter